Beginning with the Bible quoters, I have to laugh because I went to school with these people, Catholic school. I happen to know first-hand that they knew absolutely nothing about the teachings of the Bible back then and had no interest in learning. They were in a Catholic school because that is where their parents chose to send them, not because they were dying to be immersed in a world saturated with religiosity. Nothing could be further from the truth. These kids cursed like drunken sailors, cut class, smoked, drank, did drugs, and were having sex outside of marriage. The ones who by all appearances are holy rollers today, were the ones sitting in the back of religion class, passing notes, planning drunken parties, and laughing at the teacher. Now, they act like Sunday school teachers online. Throwing stones at everyone who doesn't believe what they do, and hoping we've all forgotten how they acted 25 years ago. I haven't.
The deep thinkers really crack me up. Not to be mean, but why stop now, most of these brain surgeons were not the brightest crayons in the box. Hell, I'll go one step further, kiss my own ass, and make it more clear for you. None of them were in any of MY classes. I went there, yes, I did. These were not honor students back in the day, but now they'd like the world to believe that they are intellectual philosophers, bestowing great knowledge upon the little people. The fact that grade-schoolers can look up the same quotes online, probably faster, doesn't bode well for your quest to impress. Sadly, we all know you aren't THAT bright, and when you don't even credit the person whose words you are poaching, we know that, too. It's bad enough when you constantly share these self-help messages, complete with the photo of the lone wolf or soaring eagle. I may just throw up a little in my mouth, no big deal. But when you have the balls to retype it into your status and claim it as your own, like you've had this huge enlightened moment and desperately needed to share it with all the sad sacks in your life...because you are so caring and thoughtful...you force me to start sharpening my shiv in preparation for the next time we happen to meet.
Moving forward to the most pathetic of all these losers, the former hoes. Maybe they aren't aware, but we all knew who they were in school. Their reputations preceded them and the fact that they flaunted it didn't help. Anyone who had at least one male friend was privy to the skinny about what was really going down...and WHO was going down on WHOM. I don't mean the gossip mill bullshit, I mean the one-to-one conversations between friends that weren't meant to go any further than White Castles. Catholic schools are famous for the rapid spread of information, accurate or not. But they were also famous for creating a family-like atmosphere that encouraged genuine friendships and shared information, that actually was accurate. Perhaps borne out of a desire to protect each other from the evils of the "others" or maybe it was just a way to convey basic details to keep friends in the loop about the happenings in the hallways. Either way, we KNEW.
Pretending now, that you are practically celibate kills me. You are only making a complete and total fool out of yourself. Especially those of you who got yourselves into a little bit of "trouble" in high school and took care of it. Posting sentiments such as "Abortion stops a beating heart" and letting us know that even if a woman is raped, she really should carry that baby to term, make you a total fucking hypocrite. You will not change the past by spouting bleeding heart shit today. What's done is done, and while I am not judging your teenage actions, I am pissed that you have the balls to judge the current actions of teenagers and grown ass women today. How dare you stand in judgment of others knowing that you are guilty of the very same crimes? Since you want to pretend you are Sister Mary Pure as the Driven Snow, allow me to quote for you, " He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her." Sound familiar, or did you sleep through that class, whore?
We all are aware of our own mistakes, and we all know that people can change. However, just because you think you are a better person today, and you may genuinely be, it doesn't give you carte blanche to rip others a new asshole for the decisions they make today. And I can with all confidence tell you that if you were dim bulb back in high school, you haven't miraculously become a Mensa member 25 years later. Unless you 've spent that quarter of a century retaking all those classes you slept through or cut, you are in all likelihood the same window licker you were then. Plagiarizing the wisdom of another doesn't make you smart, it makes you a thief. If Facebook was a university, you'd have been expelled by now. If you want to create a whole new persona, an updated and improved identity, that's great. Don't do it on a forum that houses everyone who knew you when you were a dumb, filthy whore. We WILL laugh at you, perhaps even publicly. Are you friggin kidding me right now???
This is hilarious!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Tara!
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